Put a Cork In It! Global Warming Takes Another Hit!

cow4It seems the environmentalists are taking another hit. And it also means the livestock in our country are going to have to feel the brunt of the environmentalist wrath. They will need to put a cork in it. I don’t know about you, but walking around with a cork stuck up that spot at the end of your digestive system that emits its final bi-products and those pungent aromatic expressions that  permeate the air and provide for moments of embarrassment if anyone is nearby, is just not my cup of tea. And it appears the most serious culprit in all this is the methane gas; the part of the process that creates the big stink.

A study just released reports the following:

“The main constituent of natural gas is methane. Although atmospheric concentrations of methane are much lower than that of CO2, totaling less than 2 ppm, pound for pound it is a much stronger GHG. Its “global warming potential” is 25 times higher than CO2′s over a 100-year time horizon, and even higher on a shorter time span. While most atmospheric methane has been traced to natural or agricultural sources, a large increase in atmospheric methane from natural gas production could overwhelm the undisputed downstream emissions benefits of gas in electricity generation, compared to coal.” – See more at: http://www.ideaslaboratory.com/2013/10/23/geoffrey-styles-study-casts-doubt-on-claim-shale-gas-is-worse-than-coal-for-environment/#sthash.aPur9dxm.dpuf

So you are telling me, the coal mining process is better in protecting the environment than the liberal’s fascination with extracting natural gas? This means the liberals and progressives are going to be at it again, coming up with their smart ideas that have unintended consequences.  They have to counter this new bad news. This problem is almost as bad as the consequence of 5 million hardworking Americans losing their health insurance due to Obamacare while the system itself has only signed up about 50,000. And it should be noted that 50K is made of mostly those folks who are going to have to pay nothing into the system since they are dirt poor. This methane emission problem, in the process of opening more natural gas wells, is going to do more damage to the environment than coal. Honestly, is this bogus global warming fear-mongering ever going to end? Don’t they realize that the sun is running out of fuel and will die out in about 1.5 billion years? That means we are all going to freeze to death. You know, through nature’s own natural form of cryonics.

It won’t be long before the environmentalists come up with the idea of corking every methane-emitting orifice on the planet. That means corks for everybody and every mammal on earth that emits methane as a natural function during just about every minute of their lives; awake or asleep. And you will only be permitted to remove the cork during the visits to the toilet where you will sit on a receptacle that has been outfitted with a methane gas suppression device. The good thing is this effort is going to create more jobs on the farm since someone is going to have help remove the corks and replace them when the cows and all their other farmland friends need to go. I am just having a image flash through my mind about who is going to be removing and replacing those corks for all the chickens. Of course, it will be easier when the chickens are trapped in their cages, but those organic chickens are running free like hippies, so catching them is going to be a challenge, in deed.

The environmentalists are going to create new businesses to make all these different corks and suppression devices for use in the home, at work, all public bathrooms, and of course corks and devices that will be suitable for use in all areas of livestock maintenance associated with the entire agricultural production processes worldwide. And you can bet the government will step in to help all these businesses get startup funds so government officials can get their normal fiduciary kickback to deposit in their Political Action Committee (PAC) coffers which I like to call their form of a taxpayer subsidy.

But isn’t it interesting how every time the environmentalists take a hit, we end up taking a bigger hit. And global warming continues to be just a façade for another parasitical move on our tax dollars. Thank you so much, Al Gore. You have done so much for us all. We will be infinitely grateful – even more so when you leave this earth for good. But we would like to recommend you use Cryonics funeral services instead of cremation which would generate additional CO2 emissions into the atmosphere or burial where extremely pungent gases may escape and pollute our environment during your natural decaying process.  Oh, wait! Isn’t CO2 emitted during the long-term maintenance of frozen bodies? Dang!

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